affect, effect

Affect as a verb means to influence.
The team's loss affected his mood.

Effect as a noun means result.
The effect was overwhelming.

Effect as a verb means to cause.
He will effect change in his company.

See how boring that is without my awesome pop-culturey sentences? You see, a common--supposedly helpful--reminder about affect/effect confusion is this atrocious sentence: "When you affect something, you have an effect on it." Really? Thanks, genius. And how should I remember that stupid, boring sentence to begin with? Rote memorization replaced by a mnemonic that must be rote memorized as well, makes for a poor replacement. Worse, it does nothing to explain the use of 'effect' as a verb.

To recap:
Affect as a verb means to influence.
Effect as a noun means result.
Effect as a verb means to cause.