True Romance
relationship dating sex advice column

True Romance

by Frank Pittarese

Dear Frank,
I'm a college student who only just came out of the closet now that I'm away from home. I go to bars with my friends, but the guys I meet there seem to want only one thing. I've yet to find anyone who was interested in a lasting relationship. Is this what I have to look forward to? Or is there another place where I'll find a better guy?
--True Romantic

Quite Frankly:
Hmmm. I'm one of those guys who only wants one thing, so this'll take some thought.

There are loads of places where you can find a better, non-sex-crazed class of guy. I'm sure you've heard of the usual haunts: volunteer organizations, church groups, gay sports leagues--but if you're not charitable, holy or sporty, they're all pointless.

Believe it or not, you're in Boy Heaven right now. College is crawling with hot, available guys, many of whom are relationship-oriented. If you see a cute guy, chat him up. A little "hello" can go a long way. Something to remember, though: Most people initially click on physical attraction. It's what makes your head turn and say, "Hey, there's a guy I wanna date." And that's fantastic. Yay, head-turning. But keep in mind that you are in control of your own body. If a guy approaches you in a bar and wants to fool around, you can tell him that you're not into hook-ups--but if he wants to go for dinner sometime to give you a call. If he's interested enough to want to shag you, he might be interested enough to want to KNOW you. But if you put out first, you'll never give him a chance. By keeping the upper hand you CAN find the man of your dreams--even in a bar.

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