Grimlock vs. Taco Bell

by Dave McAwesome (as told to by Grimlock)

Me, Grimlock, hates Taco Bell. Grimlock hates the sauce packets that sport retarded sayings made by retarded marketing department Decepticons. Grimlock hates their smarmy ways. They think they're so funny. Boo, Grimlock says, boo.

I collect straws? What that mean? Grimlock finds such pedestrian attempts at humor insulting. Grimlock furious at the lack of subtlety and wit. Grimlock is big Oscar Wilde fan. Retarded marketing department Decepticons share none of his gift. They probably not read Mark Twain either. Grimlock shakes his head sadly and laments modern education system. Wait. What does this sauce packet say?

Argh! Sauce packet taunt Grimlock. Me, Grimlock, not swallow that saucy comment.

Editor's note: At this point in the discussion, Grimlock attacked the Taco Belll hot sauce packets with the full fury his dinobot reputation has only hinted at. It was a short battle, and I wish I could tell you that the sauce packets landed a shot or two in their defense, but alas they were just sauce packets and therefore lacked the firepower of a Megatron or Starscream.

Not meant to be devoured in such large quantities (Grimlock is only twice the size of a hot sauce packet), the pseudo-salsa had its posthumous revenge when the dinobot later succumbed to fits of violent indigestion.