McAwesome Guide to Breakfast Cereal

Eat (and wax nostalgic) like a champion

by Dave McAwesome

Breakfast cereal is the most important meal of the day. Even vampires dig it, except for them it's the last meal of the day (with the sun and all).

Cerealictionary: Important breakfast cereal terminology

The following terms describe the components of your breakfast cereal. To dismiss them is to court ignorance. Know thy cereal; know thyself, you sugary sweet spoon jockey, you.

• atomic cereal unit (ACU)
• bits
• about Cereal Awareness Month
• cerealismo
• cerealographer
• egg beater
• frosted fakes
• ghettobix, ghetto-bix
• icon, character
• no-frills
• spoon jockey

The (soon-to-be) comprehensive list

• Bamm-Bamm Berry Pebbles
• Berry Berry Kix
• Berry Krispies
• Cap'n Crunch
• Cap'n Crunch and Mario team up
• Cereal Awareness Month: an annual event of incalculable importance.
• Choco Crunch
• Cookie Crisp
• Fruit Loops (Froot Loops)
• Lucky Charms: Decoded
• Star Wars Cereal

By the way, the material on this site does not in any way, shape or form intend to challenge or infringe on the rights holders of any of the characters and intellectual property. That should be pretty obvious, guy. All of the characters, brands and icons are trademarks of their respective parent companies. This site is a humor, satire and parody site, so just frickin relax.