Recession in Toyville: War on the Floor V, part 1

Commander: I’m getting back into the ‘Conquer the World’ business, Destro.
Destro: Excellent. My company will be happy to supply you with all the weapons you’ll need at exorbitant prices.
Commander: Speaking of that, your Black Friday Recession Sale was awful. Truly awful.
Destro: C’mon, I wouldn’t call our 10 for the price of 9 used landmines deal awful. We threw in a southeast asian farmer for Paypal orders.

Commander: Times are tough, Destro, but I view the ‘Conquer the World’ biz as a niche, high-risk/high-growth industry.
Destro: Like a Tiger Woods branded nightclub.
Commander: I’m a little bummed at my recent set-back, however. I planned to buy a Voltron Lionbot, shoot Keith in the face and fly the black lion myself.
Destro: Sounds fine to me.
Commander: Fine? The Voltron Lionbot is $80 on eBay. $80. I’ve been looking for years. $80? It’s 50 percent more in your company catalog.
Destro: That’s a reasonable markup price.
Commander: You silvery sot, we’re in a recession!
Destro: Not the international arms trade.
Commander: Nonsense. We’ve had to scale back a lot. The H.I.S.S. tanks were dismantled for parts to fix the washing machines in the Cobra laundromat. The Terrordrome has been converted into a hydroponic greenhouse. We’ve been ordering light beer for the Dreadnoks. And don’t even get me started on the vending machines.
Destro: What about the vending machines?
Commander: We’re out of Skittles.
Destro: Oh drat!

Continued in part 2, or back to the main War on the Floor page.

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