Archives for February 2009

American Idol: Semi-Finals.2: Results!

The second round of Semi-Finals struck last night like a bad case of the croup. We had a tone-deaf Never-Seen, a wannabe poseur-rocker, a dirty panhandler, and some sweaty old dude. And that just covers the judges. Tonight, another nine contestants go home. Three will stay. If I don’t already hate them, just give me a couple of weeks. Malice is best when left to simmer. This is American Idol. Nobody drink the beer! The beer has gone bad!
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American Idol: Semi-Finals.2: What is the Law?

“Where else can you find a welder, a bartender, a font designer, and a comedian?” Don’t miss Watchmen, in theaters March 6th! Seacrest is obviously talking about tonight’s batch of semi-finalists. Minus the obvious part. I mean, who the hell knows what these people do for a living? Most of them haven’t received more than five minutes of screen time since January. We barely know what they look like. This is American Idol. Reconstructing myself after the subtraction of my intrinsic field was the first trick I learned.
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NCAA basketball bracket 2009 – fantasy sports

NCAA March Basketball Tournament bracket. If you want to join, just follow this link. For reference, here’s the group information:

Group ID#: 2329 (we’re up to around 58 people) There is no password.

League is free. You just need a Yahoo email (also free).

Pick ’em tourney
We’re also running a pick ’em tourney (i.e. player 1 picks Uconn, player 2 picks Duke etc. until all 64 are chosen.
If there are 4 players, each will have 16 teams to root for to gain points in the ‘league’). Join by posting in this forum thread.

Fantasy Baseball 2009

Both fantasy baseball leagues filled up very, very quickly (before I could post the info here, in fact). If you want to be notified earlier, please sign up in the forum.

American Idol: Semi-Finals.1: Results!

Last night was the first round of Semi-Finals. Twelve people sang. Based on America’s votes, only three will survive tonight’s Results Show. “Is your favorite through? Take nothing for granted,” says Seacrest. Except that as far back as three weeks ago, thanks to this show’s endless pimping and shady “support,” we could have easily picked at least two of tonight’s three winners. But what do I know? I’m just some fool on the internet. This is American Idol. We can’t send people to inoperative rescue stations!
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American Idol: Semi-Finals.1: The Fix is On

Are you excited, people? Are you just about ready to burst? Couldn’t you just die, writhing with anticipation as 12 of the Top 36 take the stage tonight to actually sing? To frickin’ compete? And does it really matter that we don’t know who half of them are? And do you really care that the judges want Danny Gokey to win, anyway? I mean, really, who’s kidding who? Or whom? Which is it? This is American Idol. I’ve always thought a good lashing with a buggy whip would benefit you immensely.
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Dave McAwesome vs. New York ComicCon 2009

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Stupider than you think.

Welcome to the first episode of Dave McAwesome Presents. Do enjoy.

By the way, the Faker reference is to a He-Man character. Faker was created by Skeletor to mimic He-Man. Naturally, because cartoon makers thing kids are dumb, Faker was blue.  This is a common thing in cartoon doppelganger plots. The doppelganger is always slightly ‘off.’ By ‘slightly’ I mean so different from the real thing that no person in their right mind would have difficulty spotting the enemy.

This episode is not how I originally intended to introduce Lincoln Bristol and Panicky “Nick” Buttons, but there you go.

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Valentine’s Day with Jack and Jill

Jack and Jill owned Sumpter Mill
And raised black sheep for slaughter.
Both would frown; they got so down;
Their romance was simply disaster.

jackjillvalentines1

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Shreddies: Winning the War on Flatulence

Along with every generation there comes a man whose inventive ingenuity will both change the course of history and completely re-shape the future. Men such as Thomas Edison, Albert Einstein, Leonardo Da Vinci and the Wright brothers have all impacted our lives greater than we can ever imagine.  While we have seen great leaps in technological advancement over the past few decades we have yet to find the man in our generation who will reshape our future, until now that is. Meet Paul O’Leary, a man with such great insight and intelligence, only he could bring us Shreddies, the first ever anti-flatulence underwear.

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American Idol: Throne Under the Bus

After many weeks of singing in a desperate struggle for success and acceptance, it all comes down to this: the chance to sing in a desperate struggle for success and acceptance for many weeks. I thought it was just goldfish that did the same thing over and over because of their short memories and low intelligence. This, however, is American Idol. And knowing is half the battle.
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