American Idol Top 4 (With Results): Double Whammy

"All of these faces came to this stage with a dream," says Little Ryan. And I can assure you that no part of that dream involved boring America to tears with bad covers of tired old songs your own grandmother doesn't want to hear. But don't worry. … [Continue reading]

American Idol Top 5: Results

Last night, the Idols sang the songs of Frank Sinatra after being coached by Harry Connick, Jr. I give this show a lot of crap, but I really must applaud them when, at times like this, they go above and beyond to keep the contestants relevant and … [Continue reading]

American Idol Top 5: The Trouble With Harry

From over 100,00 contestants (well, potential contestants -- Ryan likes to exaggerate), we're down to a mere 5. That's probably 5 too many, but we've stuck it out this long, haven't we? Might as well see it through. It's not like we have lives. Or … [Continue reading]

Sober House 2, Season Finale: Pointlessness

It's the moment we've all--well, six or seven of us, as I can't imagine the ratings are much higher--been waiting for. The Sober House Season Finale. Not because we're excited about something that's happening in the episode itself, but mostly because … [Continue reading]

American Idol Top 6: Results

Last night, Shania Twain stopped by to mentor the contestants to all-new heights of tedium. Tonight, she has good sense to stay away (unless I fast-forwarded through her). Instead, we're treated to an hour-long commercial for country music. It's … [Continue reading]

American Idol Top 6: Betwixt and BeTwain

We're down to the final six, and in case there's any confusion, Ryan breaks it down for us. "A paint salesman, a high school student, a glass-blower, a mother, a father, and a construction worker." That's what this show has come to: the people in … [Continue reading]

Death Trap – Clone Wars season 2.20

Blue Fett. "Who my father was matters less than my memory of him." ...like when I picked up his helmet and his severed head plopped out. That was a pretty vivid memory of him. … [Continue reading]

Sober House 2, ep. 7: Moneylessness

If you have a drug problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire...Dr. Drew's Sober House. … [Continue reading]

American Idol Results: Idol Gives Back

After a wonderful skip-year, "Idol Gives Back" is swooping down on us like a poor, disease-ridden, bird of prey. It wants our time. It wants our money. It absolutely wants our votes. And I think, maybe, it wants our souls. This is American Idol. … [Continue reading]

American Idol Top 7: Outwit, Outplay…Inspire?

With "Idol Gives Back" looming over us like a starving, malaria-ridden guillotine, tonight's musical theme is "inspirational songs," which for the contestants, roughly translates as "something I heard on the radio at some point." But there are only … [Continue reading]